Goodbye Furry Distraction

Dear Mother and Father, I’m excited to see you soon! Fake Mom told me that you had an amazing trip and that this time away meant a lot to our family. I just wanted to update you on a few things about me. First, Fake Mom accidentally dropped a pitted kalamata olive on the floor, and I snatched it up really fast. I loved it! I promise I didn’t throw up at all. Fake Mom is a science teacher and so she did a little experiment and we learned I like sliced canned black olives and …See More

Lila Dispatch 5

Dear Mother and Father, Next to Fake Mom, Mark’s caregiver Bobby is my favorite. He’s covered in Jesus tattoos, has the best stories, and sneaks me treats. Bobby tells Mark that community keeps us strong, and I like that because I’m staying strong with support from this new family, too. Bobby reminds me that love is all you need. And pasta. Love, Lila

Lila Dispatch 4

Dear Mother and Father, This is the seventh day of my dedicated study of Chanukah. I only understand the word “amen” so far. My favorite parts are the candles, the smell of gelt, and that Fake Mom lets me join in. Can’t wait to tell you all about it! Love, Lila

Lila Dispatch 3

Dear Mother and Father, Fake Mom set this plate in case a friend or Jesus comes. Adam says it was first for Elijah before it was for Jesus. I’m hoping it’s for me. I request leftover ham. Fake Mom says I’m missing the true meaning of Chanukah and Christmas. They love me anyway. Love, Lila

Lila’s Dispatch 2

Dear Mother and Father, Fake Mom looked on Wiki How to make sure she was doing Chanukah right. She decided we needed to go to Dunkin Donuts this morning to get a dozen jelly donuts. When you come home, can I pretty please show you the wonder of the Dunkin Donuts’ drive-thru smells? I promise I only want the smells, not the eats. Love, Lila

Rental Puppy

Dear Mother and Father, Merry Christmas! I am enjoying my stay in the deep suburbs. I’ve killed two plush animals, eaten a delicious cow urethra, and have convinced this new fake mom to let me sleep with her every night. I hope you are having a wonderful time on your trip! Love, Lila